(Personal)

Dear Brother Kalmadi,

Greetings.

Kallu, our village gambler, says a special ‘yo’.

Ever since the glorious wikipedia told us that your middle name is also Kallu, he has been wearing a special friendship band in your honour.

Wait, he says ‘yo’ again

Brother, we are aware of the trouble surrounding you.

Brother Twitter has told us.

So have brother IBNLive and sister NDTV.

Everyone seems to be doubting you.

But they do not see what we see.

You have replaced ancient Business Sense with new-age Business Benevolence.

Is it true that you bought an umbrella for more than 6000 rupees?

Benevolence 2.0!

Brother, we are with you. Seriously.

Myself, Talli, Jags (Jaggu) and of course Kallu.

Last night, just before placing the last order in our country liquor bar, we formally formed the Committee of Organized Comrades of Kalmadi.

C.O.C.K. will be spearheaded by Jaggu, our village cybercafe owner and internet expert.

C.O.C.K. has a single-minded agenda.

Every time someone accuses you of building leaky stadiums, hanky-panky-deals, etc, simply send us an e-mail with that person’s address.

We will send Bajrangi, our village wrestler to sort him out.

Trust us, we guarantee the results.

And Brother, as a confidence building measure, we, on behalf of C.O.C.K., invite you to purchase the following items at these special rates from us:

• Buffalo Milk – 800 rupees/litre (water mixing 70 rupees/litre extra)

• Country Liquor – 250 rupees/pouch

• Bansi’s old cooler (1 year old, good condition) – 18000 rupees.

• Broomstick – 600 rupees a piece.

All items will be delivered on advance payment with proper stamped receipt.

Okay?

So much for now Brother.

Bajrangi awaits your signal.

Meanwhile, ignore all those aspersions and keep that eye on the games.

Like Talli said just before he broke the bottle on Dhania’s head last night:

Only someone as uncommon as you can make the Commonwealth Games a success.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

P.S. Since the bank account of C.O.C.K. has still not been opened, we are accepting only cash payments for now

I am, what you can call, a reformed frequent flier.

And the designation does not come easy.

You must, compulsorily, undergo life-altering experiences to earn it.

At times, experiences that alter the impression left by a previous life-altering experience.

For instance, once, after being crushed between two portly businessmen all through a Mumbai-Delhi flight, I left strict instructions with my office to ALWAYS telecheck me into a window seat.

I love window seats. Always have.

Sigh.

The next few weeks were spent flying happily ever after.

Till it happened.

I was to fly on my usual Mumbai-Delhi sector.

I was sleep starved – whenever I have to take the first flight out, I barely sleep in the worry that I won’t wake up in time.

My office made no mistakes.

It was me in the window seat.

A middle-aged gentleman in the aisle seat.

Hunky and dory were together.

Till SHE walked in.

A conservative estimate would peg her between 100 to 115 kilos.

Saree-clad, very-well-fed Punjabi lady, returning home to Delhi, probably.

She ‘settled’ in.

What do I tell you now?

That I spent the rest of the flight with my face squashed against the window like a first time flier?

No it wasn’t voluntary.

When you have a mammoth elbow intruding across three-fourths of your seat space, there is nowhere else to go.

I had to refuse breakfast.

There was NO way I could have handled a tray in that kind of space.

It’s bad enough when you have to share your seat with a giant elbow.

It’s worse when the elbow belongs to a giant who decides to sleep after breakfast.

And sinks a little into you with every passing breath.

Now consider the fact that the elbow belongs to a woman.

What will you scream?

Rape?

I would have.

Had I managed to somehow extricate myself from under that elbow and reached upwards to buzz the air-hostess, I seriously would have.

We disembarked in Delhi.

She, refreshed.

Me, crushed. Literally.

Frequent flying is no fun, my friend.

After Vietnam and Advertising, it ranks third in my books.

That morning I learnt that even a window seat can’t save you from the scourge of an intrusive elbow.

My humble advice?

If you can, fly business.

If you can’t, then beg the ground-staff to tell you who or what has checked into your middle seat.

If you can do neither, quietly take the train.

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

In case you have a similar moving experience, do write in.

Gullible’s Travels will be glad to reproduce the same in the larger interest of travelers.

When you post after a 3 month hiatus, it had better be good.

I though this would be a good way to return.

I received this via email from a colleague.

Who personally knows Aditi, the author of this email.

So I’m doing the next best thing I can.

Asking you to read it as well.

__________

Dear All,

This email is actually an appeal and since I want you to truly understand what I am trying to say, I will not take any short cuts.

As you may all know I am a fellow with Teach For India. This stated very simply means, I am a teacher. I teach 45 children in a low income school in Goregaon East and make a difference in the lives of about 300 children in the school, in different ways-big or small.

My co teacher and I took 6 of our students to Oberoi Mall, Goregaon, the other day. This outing was conducted with the aim of celebrating their success. Each one of the 45 children was given a differentiated goal to achieve, 6 of them made it.

At the end of a very happy meal  we took them to Crossword Book Store. The sale was on and all the books were out on display. My kids walked in and were truly mesmerized by the sight. The colours, pictures and everything there, was a treat. They picked up books and sat on the carpet, reading.

Some understood, while others simply read.

This is the thought I had while we were there. If you put any child in a place that offers learning, a child will learn without being taught. This store had so much to give.

My class is really colourful. Its walls are plastered with a lot of information. They have storybooks to read, but most of them have been read.

We need books.

Here is my appeal:

In case you people have books, magazines, activity books, picture dictionaries, normal dictionaries, and all or any form of literature suitable for children between 6-14 years – those that you have outgrown, those your children have outgrown, your nieces and nephews, and everyone else – please could you pass them over to me?

I promise, as long as the material is in English, it will be used.

Send me an email on aditirawat@gmail.com and we will find a way to collect the gifts.

Looking forward to receiving support from you. Cause I truly want to believe that everyone wants to help, but does not know where exactly to start from.

Feel free to begin

Thanks!

Aditi

P.S- please circulate this to everyone.

–

Indira Aditi Rawat
Teach For India Fellow.
Class Teacher- 2B
Divine Child High School
Sanjay Nagar
Malad East, Mumbai.

“One day ALL children will attain an excellent education”

PS: Aditi’s kids won in the ‘Top 20 Category’ in the Design For Giving Project. Out of 33000 registrations.

Here is a little video: Click Here